It's hard...

It's hard when the baby nurses all night long and the toddler refrain of "dow sares" (down stairs) begins far earlier than your tired, aching body can bare. It's hard when sick child leads to sick baby leads to sick momma and the daddy has to work overnight anyway. 

It's hard when who you used to be doesn't seems to fit and your new skin feels a little too tight and itches in it's newness. It's hard when the people you always thought would be there drift away with the winds of change. 

It's hard when you hear beauty in the voice of another, but you can't find the strength in your own. It's hard when someone else's "failure" looks an awful lot like your "unattainable" goal. It's hard when you measure yourself with the yardstick of another's success.

Life is hard, and it shows no signs of letting up, but God never wanted you to be her or us to be them. He only wants us to let Him in - to let go of our need for control and to allow Him to guide our steps. To let him set our goals and use his standards to measure our success. 

To put it in the words of another more eloquent than myself -

Jehovah Jireh, 

My provider, 

His grace is sufficient for me. 

My God will provide all my needs,

According to his riches and glory, 

He will give his angels charge over me

Jehovah Jireh cares for me... (this video is dated, but just made me soo happy!)

 

If the God of the universe cares for me - if He will provide for me needs, and He offers me his grace - who I am to worry when life gets hard. Who am I to question His strength and His ability to provide in all circumstances? When life gets hard, where will you turn, in whom will you rest, whose strength will you rely on? 

I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I'm glad that I don't have to have it all together when things get hard, I'm glad that I don't have to have all the answers - that I don't have to be responsible for it all - I'm glad that my God is my provider and that my Heavenly Father is always here to help me when life gets hard.

Operation 9 Month Off - Week 3-5

Err, take 3 - I've started this post two other times, but with running off to care for babes - it's disappeared twice since I didn't save it! Anyway...I better get it done, so that I can link up with

How did I do this week: (eek - the last 3 weeks!)

Anyone want to guess why I've been AWOL the last three weeks? No, no, I'm not pregnant again...we need to give this body a little more recovery time than that! I have just completely falled off the wagon - I stopped charting my foods, I ate far too many ice cream sodas, and I didn't make exercise or even being active a priority! Err, I'm soo mad at myself - because I actually got down to 183 - which was 2 pounds below my pre-Noah weight and now I'm back up to 187! I decided it's really time to take things seriously - it's time to post real numbers and get real with my fitness journey! This isn't just about losing weight! It is about being a good example for my boys, it's about being healthy for another pregnancy in the future, it's about living better and longer with my family! So, I found a few weight loss link-ups that I plan to join in on, and on Monday I (& J) signed up for WW online. I want to lose a lot of weight and I want to lose it quickly, but I don't want to hurt my ability to nurse Noah, or to limit his nutrition or calories in any way. My issue has always been motivation and sticking to it - but I need to be motivated to be healthier for my kids - to not be the tired mom! If I am going to stick with this as I lifestyle, then I need the flexibility of something like Weight Watchers to let me have my "cheat day" while not blowing the whole diet! It doesn't do me any good to lose ten pounds only to gain it back over and over because I wasn't drinking enough water or I wasn't eating enough, etc. I really like how the new plan gives you lots of healthy options for 0 points (like the banana I just had). I did Weight Watchers in college when I was at my lowest weight (128) and it was a lifestyle that I could stick with and it was easy - but over time I slowly shifted out of that lifestyle - so I'm hoping getting back into it I can go back to the old habits that I used to have and create a new lifestyle - rather than the calorie counting that I've been doing and constant analysis of everything. As I remember, you get to the point where you know how many points most of your favorite foods are - which makes things easy! I really want this to be easy - and I'm coming to the realization - that it's just not. We've hit the 3 month mark - so if I want to hit my goals by Noah's first birthday then the 9 month countdown is officially ON! It's time to make this happen! Hopefully, finding a few friends along the way will help me stick to it!

Measurements (starting points in italics): 

• Waist (smallest point): 35" (35")
• Hips (largest point): 45" (45")
• Arms: 12" (12")
• Thighs: 28" (28")
• Chest: 40" (40")
• Weight: 187.3 (189.9)

Here's a reminder of the rewards I have planned for reaching weight loss goals:

• Reach 0 point ( 185 - post-Owen/pre-Noah weight): Get my eyebrows done - DONE
• -5 pounds: Massage
• -10 pounds: Manicure/pedicure
• -20 pounds (pre-Owen weight): New woven wrap - a shortie 
• -30 pounds: Haircut/color
• -40 pounds: Overnight date/mini vacation 
• -50 pounds (goal weight): New wardrobe (I'll need it!)

Want to do this together and help encourage one another and keep each other on track?? I'd love a partner, or several, in this! Let me know! I'm on Weight Watchers and myfitnesspal and fitbit and twitter - join me! Email or comment with your usernames and I'll friend you!

Operation 9 Months Off - Week 2

Well, it's been another week since I shared my weight loss goals and plan - let's see how I did!

Here's a reminder of the rewards I have planned for reaching weight loss goals:

Reach 0 point (post-Owen/pre-Noah weight): Get my eyebrows done

-5 pounds: Massage

-10 pounds: Manicure/pedicure

-20 pounds (pre-Owen weight): New woven wrap - a shortie 

-30 pounds: Haircut/color

-40 pounds: Overnight date/mini vacation 

-50 pounds (goal weight): New wardrobe (I'll need it!) 

How did I do this week:

It was another crummy week for activity and calories! It rained 3 days and we all came down with colds and I could probably come up with a few more excuses to ;) - but anyway - didn't do too well, although it could have been worse!

Activity Goals: 

1. Workout/video 3x/wk - FAIL - one workout 

2.  Run/walk 3x/wk - FAIL - one 7 mile walk - better than nothing, but still a fail

3. Stay under calorie goal 6x/wk FAIL - I went over calories 3 days this week, not much, but still

4. Reach 10,000 steps 4x/wk FAIL - 1/4 days

5. Reach 10 flights of stairs every day -  FAIL - 2/7 days

6. Drink 100oz of water/day - FAIL - 1/7 days - once you get out of the habit it's hard to get back! 

Measurements (starting points in italics): 

Waist (smallest point): 34" (35")

Hips (largest point): 45" (45")

Arms: 12" (12")

Thighs: 28" - changed position to measure this is the new starting point

Chest: 40" (40")

Weight: +3.8 (+4.9lb) - down 5.9 from post-vacation weight

Since, I went from no workouts and no runs/walks to one of each this week, maybe next week I'll pull off two of each?? I was really hoping that posting here was going to keep me accountable and help me to do better sticking with this, but I don't seem to be doing too well so far! I really want to make healthy habits, but I'm pretty stuck in my old unhealthy ones and I've been really good at finding excuses for why I can't do things and why I need crummy snacks! (Like it rained 3 days this week so I couldn't exercise and we all got crummy colds - although I could have figured something out if I made it a priority!) Thankfully, the weight gain last week was really vacation bloat and I'm down a little from the week before!!! It looks like I have found the right calorie intake to lose weight slowly and still maintain my milk supply - yay! I'm still hovering at the same weight I've been at for two months now though, and it's super frustrating! Anyone else in the same boat? Want to do this together and help encourage one another and keep each other on track?? I'd love a partner, or several, in this! Let me know!

Operation 9 Months Off - Week 1

Well, it's been one week since I shared where I am starting out postpartum and my goals for where I want to end up by next here - let's see how I did! 

Here's a reminder of the rewards I have planned for reaching weight loss goals:

Reach 0 point (post-Owen/pre-Noah weight): Get my eyebrows done

-5 pounds: Massage

-10 pounds: Manicure/pedicure

-20 pounds (pre-Owen weight): New woven wrap - a shortie 

-30 pounds: Haircut/color

-40 pounds: Overnight date/mini vacation 

-50 pounds (goal weight): New wardrobe (I'll need it!) 

How did I do this week:

Overall, not well at all! We left Wednesday morning when J was post-call to head up north to J's parent's house - then Thursday morning we ventured even further north to visit a lake and spend the weekend fishing and enjoying family cabin time for Owen's birthday! It was a great time, but long road trips don't really facilitate exercise or sticking to calorie goals (we decided to cheat and not count car snacks - because they are a necessity!) 

Activity Goals: 

1. Workout/video 3x/wk - FAIL - didn't do this a single time :(

2.  Run/walk 3x/wk - FAIL - didn't run a single time either

3. Stay under calorie goal 6x/wk PASS (sorta) - I was 350 calories over one day this week and under 6 days (except for car snacks one other day, but those don't count, right?!)

4. Reach 10,000 steps 4x/wk FAIL - 1/4 days

5. Reach 10 flights of stairs every day -  FAIL - 4/7 days

6. Drink 100oz of water/day - FAIL - 2/7 days - although 6 days I had over 48 oz which is fitbit's water goal

Measurements: 

Waist (smallest point): 35" - +1/2in

Hips (largest point): 45" - +1/2in

Arms: 12" - same 

Thighs: 25" - same 

Chest: 41" - +1in

Weight: +9.7lb (54.7lbs from goal weight) - up 5 pounds since last week

Eek! Well, that's definitely not the direction that I wanted to see any of those numbers going - but it is reality and sometimes that happens as you figure this stuff out. All of these numbers were taken at 8 in the evening after eating and drinking all day - immediately after getting home from our lake trip - so I'm hoping the numbers are negatively inflated from travel and they'll be balanced back out by next week after a few normal days back at home with normal water intake and sleep, etc. 

xxfingers crossedxx that vacation bloat is all that this weight gain is - because even though my activity level was a little low (combined 20 hours in the car over 5 days) - and my water intake was low without my brita (relying on purchased water bottles in limited supply) - my calorie intake truly wasn't that bad! We'll see, after next week it may be time to pull out the big guns and sign up for weight watchers!

Noah's arrival - Part 3 - Postpartum

Both boys minutes after birth

Once Noah had entered the world, I expected everything to immediately return to normal, but things didn't exactly work that way. Noah was placed on my chest and after a few minutes was weighed and measured and all of that - since he was so big (9lb8oz @ 37w2d) they were a little extra concerned about him. I got about a million stitches while he was checked out. When they put him back on my chest, he was a little lazy at first and wasn't really latching on and I felt guilty thinking he was that way because I had taken the Stadol. His blood sugar was a little low, as was his body temperature. Not enough to take him to the NICU, but enough that the nurses were really pushy - they let us try to nurse for about an hour and started really pushing a bottle of formula - we requested a cup to supplement with like we had used with Noah - and they sent for lactation - and the first LC who came was way less than helpful. Noah continued to be lazy and his blood sugar dropped more, so I relented and let the pushy nurse give Jason a bottle a formula to feed him as he really hadn't eaten at all in the first few hours. They also made us keep him under the warmer's for what seemed like forever.

While I had been on the Stadol and was all loopy and confused - my MIL, D, had arrived in town and picked up Owen from L's house where J had dropped him off that morning. J let her (and everyone else) know that Noah was here - and told them (D and Owen) that they could come after we were moved to the recovery room in a few hours. Because of the blood sugar and body temp issues we stayed in the delivery room a little longer than usual, but eventually they bathed Noah, got him warmed up again, and moved us over to the other room (they didn't have warmers in the recovery rooms - so that was why we couldn't leave). 

We moved over to recovery and my blood pressure stayed high, but got a little better and after 24 hours - we were getting a little better at nursing, blood sugars and temps were stabilized, and Noah was looking pretty good - except for the fact that he was very bruised - his nose and cheeks and all along the backs of his forearms. He looked like a little boxer and as time passed he was getting a little jaundiced. J stayed in the hospital with us while D was at home with Owen - and each morning J went home to take Owen to his swim lessons, so he wouldn't miss out and end up behind. (Those lessons were amazing, but that's another post). Then, Owen would go home and nap with "Gramps" as he liked to call her - and J would come back to me - then later D would bring Owen to the hospital for dinner and a visit each day. 

Owen was not really a fan of his baby brother at first, hated being in my hospital room, and didn't want Noah anywhere near him. He just wanted to walk the halls and leave with grandma - it sort of broke my heart! But, each day he did get a little better and would let Noah a little closer to him and spent some time cuddled up with me. 

After 24 hours they took me off of the mag, but my blood pressure didn't normalize like it should have and they continued my meds from pregnancy and increased the dose. But my BP kept rising, so they started my on a second med on day 2pp and I had to stay another night :( - by day three my BP was still super high, but the doc on call agreed to increase my dose and let us go home and monitor my BP at home! Yay! 3 days in the hospital is way too long! We were finally home Saturday afternoon and able to start adjusting as a family - and have Noah's newborn pictures taken on Sunday. Within, a few days at home, Owen was very protective of Noah and always wanted to know where he was and hold him - so I was happy to know that most of his difficulty was with the hospital and not with me or his brother.  

I had a check up about a week pp and my blood pressure was normal on meds, but my doc kept me on them, but said to continue checking at home and after another week I was off of both meds as my BP started getting low! Yay! I went for another check after a week off meds and BP was normal - and it was still normal at my 6 week check! Yay! Although, Owen was a little traumatized by all of this and gets berry upset when my blood pressure is checked now - he's a smart cookie and knows that when they checked momma she went away and slept at the hospital and he did not like that! 

After discharge, Noah had to go back after 24hrs for a jaundice check and his levels were even higher so we had to go in Monday for another check - then we got a call that said he had to go the the children's hospital and have him checked again that evening since his levels were even more elevated and that if they hadn't gone down - he would have to be admitted to go under the lights - I was super upset and we prayed like crazy and nursed as much as I could possibly get him too - even more than we had been - which was every two hours since we left the hospital trying to get things back to normal. Evidently, his jaundice was greatly increased by all he bruising from birth. That night we got the hospital and they couldn't find the lab orders from our doc, so we had to wait over an hour as they got a hold of the doc to send new orders - praying and waiting and praying and waiting. They finally brought us back and drew blood - then we waited the next half hour in the can for the results - to find out if he would be admitted or go home - and praise the Lord - we got a call that his bilirubin levels had dropped drastically - way more than could have been expected - and he didn't need to be admitted! We went home and scheduled another check for Wednesday along with his 1wk checkup. He had lost more weight since he left the hospital, but was back over his birth weight and completely over all jaundice issues by his 2 week appointment! 

So, overall, we were very blessed and protected, but it was quite the stressful two weeks while both Noah and I recovered and got healthy! I was so glad that J was able to be home for those two weeks with soo many doctors appointments and the nonstop feeding and feeling crummy from the BP meds (they made me tired and really achey) - then in the middle of that time J's parents came for the weekend and then at the end of J's time off work, my parents came for two weeks. So, our first month together was very full and blessed and passed very quickly! And now, Noah is already two months old and we are finally getting into a new routine an getting back out for playdates and a more normal life. It's amazing how long it really takes to start getting back to normal with two under two (only for a few more days!).

Even though my pregnancy and delivery were not ideal, Noah was and is so completely worth any and all difficulty in getting him here! I thank the Lord every day for both of my amazing boys!

Birth plans...and when things don't happen according to plan

So, birth plans...ha! I laugh in the face of birth plans - or at least my children laugh in my face for thinking I could plan their births.

I'm having a really hard time letting go of the idea of birth that I have in my head and how things are supposed to go and how smooth and gentle and natural. How calm - breathing through contractions - pushing and working hard, of course, but still beautiful - and I'm sure highly "hollywoodized." Except, it isn't just Hollywood promoting this beautiful birth picture in my head, that might actually be easier to press aside, it's my dad telling me all these Christian things about how I don't have to feel any pain and how I'm delivered from that and I need to have faith in God and so on and so forth - on one hand I want to say "dude, you are a dude - you aren't allowed to have an opinion here" and on the other it's really hard not to feel like I'm letting him down, like I'm not strong enough or I don't have enough faith to believe for the healing that he so believes for - and there really are women who say that it was all smooth and easy, etc. Then on top of that, you have the idea and fact that my mom had very healthy pregnancies and had both my brother and sister at home with a midwife - so that was my plan and ideal growing up - I was born in the hospital, but that was "due to the midwife rupturing membranes too soon and my parents not listening to the prompting of the Spirit to wait" - I was good with that idea - I was good with childbirth being hard but natural and beautiful and almost spiritual. This is the same ideal promoted by midwives and the "crunchy" and the naturally minded - "women have been doing this on their own in fields for thousands of years and getting up and getting to work...." And so on and so forth.

Yet, things haven't worked out for me that way in the birthing and pregnancy department - you can read/reread Owen's birth story here - things just don't always look the way you see them in your head - and I'm trying to cope with that and my vastly different reality without embracing/claiming it as MY fault or feeling badly about how I'm not strong enough or healthy enough or how I don't have enough faith. I'm really, really struggling with that and how to think about it and what the right perspective should be (although I do think it is a sign of a healthy grip on postpartum emotions that I am able to articulate this struggle). It's just hard when things don't go the way we hope they will - although I need to say that I know how completely and entirely blessed we are that things worked out as well as they did and that we all came out of the experience healthy and strong with no serious problems or issues! I'm working on writing up Noah's birth story and will post part one tomorrow. Sorry I've been so neglectful of this space for the last month - but I've been focusing on my little family and enjoying J's time off (we saved his vacation so he could have 2 weeks off after Noah arrived and it was amazing having him home and then my parents were here for two weeks after that), but now we are starting to get into more of a routine and get the little issues we've head under control, so I should be back here more regularly from now on! Thanks for your congratulations and support and for sticking around while I disappeared for a while!

Blog Every Day in May: Day 19

Day 19, Sunday: Five of your favorite blogs and what you love about them

Well, I sorta did this on day 5 with the love on a blogger you are friends with prompt as I didn't really feel close enough to any blogger to fully embrace the spirit of that prompt - so you can look back to that post to read a little more about 3 bloggers I adore!

A few more favorites:

1. Growing up Geeky - I love how Melissa embraces the geeky and keeps it real.  She was recently struggling with postpartum anxiety and it has been great seeing her turn the corner and become more of herself again - I really appreciate how she shared that struggle! And now she is navigating a return to work and the difficulties of being away from her girls.
2. I Love You More than Carrots - AP is another boy mom and I love watching her cutie-tootie boys grow! AP is super funny and she always makes me laugh, especially with her hashtags on instagram! This year her goal is "college hot and no babies" - at least until her birthday - and she is so cute! I love her style and the way she dresses her boys! They all always look super nice!
3. My Little Mustache - Jess is just super, super sweet and she is a great encourager. She is always looking for new ways to "encourage it forward." She really is an inspiration as she always has a heart for others - plus her son, Judah, is super cute - and she is an awesome "crocheter" 
4. Grace for Moms - This blog has many different contributors and offers lots of different posts for moms - always encouraging with a great Christian perspective.
5. Oh Dear Drea  - Drea and I have almost nothing in common, but her photos are gorgeous and she makes vegan food look super yummy - I need to gather up some courage and try one of her recipes - it would probably benefit us to eat a little more like her!

Blog Every Day in May: Day 18

Challenge Day 18: Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try to be descriptive about what you remember and how you felt.

I should have seen it coming - I should have known that I didn't quite fit into the world they were entering - but I didn't see it. I didn't have a clue and I was completely and utterly blindsided. My best friend Jessica sat me down and handed me a note - a "Dear John" letter of sorts - informing me that we had grown apart and this was the "hardest letter she'd ever had to write" that I was so important to her and that we would always be friends, but that we just weren't best friends anymore.

This happened some time in the spring of my seventh grade year - my friends were beginning to experiment with boys and cigarettes and dieting that may have bordered on eating disorders - and I was still just a goody-goody little Christian girl - petrified of doing anything "wrong" and getting into "trouble." I was completely and utterly devasted - I wasn't heading in the direction that they were - I wasn't "cool" enough to be a part of the group anymore and I didn't know how to do anything about it. I was DUMPED and it wasn't by a boy - it was by all my friends in the world. I went to this junior high for these friends - I followed them there even though my parents had another school in mind.

I continued to sit with the group at lunch over the next few days, because I knew no one else and they had said that we were all still friends - I just lost my "best friend" status - yet after only 2-3 days - I was sat down again and told that maybe it was time that I should look for some new friends and somewhere else to sit at lunch. Now, my junior high was not a mega school - it was a small, private Christian school with about 60-100 people per grade level. I'm not sure how many kids were in our class that year, but we graduated with about 80 - and these 8 girls included the 6 that I had spent 2nd through 6th grade with and of the rest of our class there were a few other groups of girls that were all established and had been bonding for the last 6-8 months of the school year. Additionally, the girls that I had previously been friends with were the "cool" girls - otherwise known as the "mean girls"
 - that was another reason I had been "kicked out" because I wasn't really capable of participating in the mean, but I still was linked to them in everyone's minds - even if I wasn't directly mean to them - I was a "mean girl" by association.

So, instead of being welcomed into a new group - I was a social leper - with the other girls not sure what to make of me. I sat alone in the quad and ate my lunch trying not to cry for weeks. A few times I sat with various groups of girls, but I was never really welcomed in, so I read books, and I ate, and I sat alone - for most of the rest of the year. I was so ashamed and felt as though I didn't deserve friends and that no one would like me anyway. The people who knew me for years and years didn't want anything to do with me, so why would anyone new. I didn't tell my mom for a while, but she figured it out.

I look back, and think about the things that they were doing and it makes sense that they didn't want to be friends with me, and it makes sense that I didn't fit in the group any more - but it didn't change the feelings of abandonment and rejection. It doesn't change the fact that I still struggle to be genuine and let people get to know me on a close intimate level. It doesn't change the years that I spent doing and being who and what anyone and everyone wanted me to do and be - just so that they would like me. I made friends with a group of much nicer girls the next year - who I continued to be friends with through high school - but who I seldom speak to now. I went on to spend a lot of time and energy "making relationships work" - I dated people who I should never have dated, because they liked me and I liked being liked. I needed to be cared about and wanted - and I compromised a lot of who I was for that.

Thankfully, the Lord pulled me out of the cycle and provided me with the most amazing man to marry - who loves me fully and completely - even the ugly and the hurt. The Lord gave me a family who whether we agree or disagree or fight or whatever else - we love each other fiercely
 and will always protect and support one another. And now in this new town - where I had no family and I had a husband who fully loved and supported me and had helped me gain a significant amount of strength and confidence in myself, but who had to work A LOT - in this new town, the Lord is teaching me about trusting other women. He is teaching me about having friends - it is still a struggle, and there is still a piece of that twelve year old girl inside of me wondering why she did wrong and why no one likes her. But, that voice telling me that no one likes me and no one ever will is getting quieter - and God's voice is getting louder - the voice that tells me that I was fearfully and wonderfully made and that I am exactly who He created me to be. I can't make everyone like me - I can't make everyone want to be my friend - but I can be the me that God wants me to be - I can be fully and completely myself - no apologies - and I can trust that the Lord will provide me with the right friends, rather than just any friends. I can trust that He will provide me with friends who will love and support me and who will like me just as I am, while inspiring me to grow. And those friends - are way better than the friends who you have to constantly work to impress and who you have to constantly question and assess and keep trying to change who you are to keep around.

Blog Every Day in May: Day 16

Day 16, Thursday: Something difficult about your "lot in life" and how you're working to overcome it

All in all, I know I've been a bit of a complainer in recent weeks, but my "lot in life" is a pretty darn good one! We have everything that we need and more. We are all healthy and able-bodied - I am married to the best man I know, and my kid is fantastic! Sure, J works almost twice as much as the average American and that is hard - but he has worked similar hours since we met, and when he is here - he is all here and makes us a priority - often at his own expense - so I really don't have room to claim J's job something difficult in my "lot" that I need to overcome - even though it does come with it's own unique challenges.

However, there is something that I've been struggling with and trying to overcome - especially this last year. This life married to a surgeon - and life in general - includes a lot of unknowns - his schedule is irregular and there could always be something that comes up keeping him away for a genuinely good reason. This is hard for me - not having everything all lined up and tied with a bow is hard for me. I am a planner....I like to know what is coming so that I can be prepared. I don't like surprises and I don't like change. Yet, life requires flexibility and an ability to embrace the unknown. That is something that I have never been good at. Now, throughout this pregnancy, we have been faced with unknown after unknown and question after question - all of which received vague non-answers. It seems that each time I go to the doctor I face another "if" and receive no sense of security or answers. I'm hoping that starting these meds will lead to a little more certainty and an ability to plan/determine when things are coming - since I've been told several times now that this pregnancy is most likely ending with an induction - but each time we speak it varies as to when - being anywhere from now to 39 weeks - and that is a big difference, especially with a toddler who I have to prepare for a new brother and who needs to be taken care of when I am in the hospital.

This has been the year in which I have had to learn that I don't always know the plan, and I don't always get to have all the answers - but I need to step forward in faith and continue on "for I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." {Jer. 29:11} He knows what He's doing and His plan is better than mine could ever be - so maybe sometimes a little bit of the unknown is okay and maybe I don't have to have it all figured out - because He does!

Blog Every Day in May - Day 11

Prompt - sell yourself in 10 words or less.

I am a child of God - saved by grace alone!

It is amazing knowing that those 10 words are all I need to be!